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Apr. 16th, 2005 10:28 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
blue_ajahIt is afternoon in the Dreaming, and Moiraine is in her study, looking down at the pages Joe gave her the night before.
"Coda," the first page says. "Found."
Joe's words echo in her mind. There's somethin' I know other people here don't. Don't reckon it'd be wise to tell them. You might do, though. You'd know what to do with it better than me, and I don't think you'd shy from what you'd have to do. One way or another.
She turns the first page and begins to read.
* * * * *
Several hours later, the Aes Sedai is still sitting at her desk, silent and unmoving. The last page has been turned over long before. Moiraine is staring out the window at the Garden, but her gaze is unfocused and unseeing.
Endings are heartless.
Her own words, spoken to Lan long ago and to Joe just last night, return to her now like the stab of a knife. I am as hard as I have to be.
She will have to be, she knows. Not only for Roland's sake, or because Joe has asked it of her -- no, trusted her with it, trusted her--
To be as much of a cast-iron bitch as I'm bein' a bastard. 'Cos I think your goal and his is the same, and you'll do what he wants instead of what might make him happy like anybody halfways human would do.
--but because it is what has to be done. The Wheel weaves. And as she thinks this, she laughs, bitterly.
"Death is lighter than a feather, duty heavier than a mountain." Her voice is harsh with the effort to stay calm, even here, and not at all like her own. "I told him that, too. It is only that I never quite realized just how true the saying is."
A strange, momentary shift in the Warder bond shakes her from her thoughts. Carefully, Moiraine puts the papers in the desk drawer, closing and locking it; and then, with a touch to the key at her throat, the Aes Sedai disappears from the room.
"Coda," the first page says. "Found."
Joe's words echo in her mind. There's somethin' I know other people here don't. Don't reckon it'd be wise to tell them. You might do, though. You'd know what to do with it better than me, and I don't think you'd shy from what you'd have to do. One way or another.
She turns the first page and begins to read.
* * * * *
Several hours later, the Aes Sedai is still sitting at her desk, silent and unmoving. The last page has been turned over long before. Moiraine is staring out the window at the Garden, but her gaze is unfocused and unseeing.
Endings are heartless.
Her own words, spoken to Lan long ago and to Joe just last night, return to her now like the stab of a knife. I am as hard as I have to be.
She will have to be, she knows. Not only for Roland's sake, or because Joe has asked it of her -- no, trusted her with it, trusted her--
To be as much of a cast-iron bitch as I'm bein' a bastard. 'Cos I think your goal and his is the same, and you'll do what he wants instead of what might make him happy like anybody halfways human would do.
--but because it is what has to be done. The Wheel weaves. And as she thinks this, she laughs, bitterly.
"Death is lighter than a feather, duty heavier than a mountain." Her voice is harsh with the effort to stay calm, even here, and not at all like her own. "I told him that, too. It is only that I never quite realized just how true the saying is."
A strange, momentary shift in the Warder bond shakes her from her thoughts. Carefully, Moiraine puts the papers in the desk drawer, closing and locking it; and then, with a touch to the key at her throat, the Aes Sedai disappears from the room.
